31st Sunday of the Ordinary Time [A]
November 5, 2023
Matthew 23:1-12
One of the greatest crises in our time is the crisis of fatherhood. In various societies, many children live and grow up without their fathers. Many surveys and studies have pointed out this reality affected especially the western countries. Yet, the virus is also penetrating other countries that possess strong family cultures. The absence of a father in the family severely affects the children’s behaviours. Children without fathers tend to grow into persons with various mental issues and problems with society. Now, in the Gospel, Jesus said, “Call no one father on earth… (Mat 23:9).” In our context, Jesus’ words are intriguing. Why did Jesus not allow us to call anyone father while our societies need fathers more than ever?
Before we go deeper into Jesus’ words, we will delve first into the necessity of the real presence of the fathers in the families. Father has many essential and irreplicable roles, yet if we must sum up, there are two most fundamental duties. The Bible speaks of these two characters in the book of Genesis, “The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to serve (עבד) it and guard (שׁמר) it. (Gen 2:15)” From this verse, God assigned Adam two critical responsibilities: serve and guard the garden. Since the garden is where Adam and Eve lived, the garden symbolizes the home and family of Adam. Like Adam, every man who enters fatherhood receives these two essential duties.
To serve (עבד – read: abad) can be understood as providing its necessary things so that the family may function adequately and even flourish. It is not enough for a father to provide material needs to his children, but also emotional and, most importantly, spiritual. Many men work hard for their families, but when they return home, they spend their time with themselves rather than with the children. Many men are indeed good providers but tend to neglect the faith growth of their children. Many men even have a misconception that emotional and spiritual needs are only the jobs of women. Yet, the way women and men love are different, and the children need both to grow healthily. To serve means also to teach true values and morality, and often, these are best taught by examples, not only by words.
To guard (שׁמר – read: shamar) means to protect from danger, both that are external and internal, both physical and spiritual. Often, it is easy to protect the family from external and visible forces because we can easily perceive the threats. But, to guard against the invisible enemies is much more difficult. The unseen dangers can come in the form of false ideas or wrong moral teachings. Fathers need truth and clarity to distinguish between the right and the wrong. Fathers also need a balance of firmness and gentleness when they give corrections and discipline. Children without discipline tend to grow into weak and indecisive adults, while children raised in violence tend to become rebellious men and women.
When Jesus said, “Call no one father on earth except the Father in heaven.” Jesus did not prohibit all men from being called fathers. Instead, Jesus reminded us that all men do not automatically become a father when they have children (both physically and sacramentally). Unless they follow the examples of the heavenly Father, they do not deserve the title ‘father’. To serve and to guard are two things that every father must do, and we have our Father in heaven as our inspiration and model.
Rome
Valentinus Bayuhadi Ruseno, OP